Monday, 31 August 2009

To Linger with Intent



The time has come to leave Aotearoa, the land of the long white cloud, the mystical and beautiful New Zealand. This morning, during weekly Marketing Devotions we all stepped outside to ‘linger’. Alison, my colleague and friend, explained to us how important it was to linger each day and take a step back from the busy reality of life. So as I walked alone, with Alison’s watch attached to my wrist and the 10 minutes she had given us, I lingered by a tree and discovered the lives of insects and tree bark whilst considering my next steps. What are my desires in life? What is life all about? Am I doing the right thing? For someone who moves around a lot, I still struggle with change. As I look up at the tree, that changes so slowly each year I wonder if our purpose on this earth is to find a place to settle and live life everyday the same or similar. I ponder if 'God' gave us this earth, are we suppose to discover it or stop. I wonder if life is for research and study or for permanence and still. As I walk around the tree and listen to the Tui (notorious Kiwi bird) and the other birds singing to each other, I close my eyes and decide that life is taking me on my journey and things happen for a reason. Change is part of that reason and I must go with what is already placed in front of me. I then speculate that just maybe it isn’t change that I am afraid of and maybe it is not travelling or returning to England that is bothering me slightly but maybe it goes something like this....in the worlds of Nelson Mandela, "There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered."

New Zealand, today, is so beautiful, the sun beaming down on my back, the birds chirping in the trees above and World Vision standing tall in front of me. I have spent 10 months working hard in the Marketing team as the Student Leadership Development Coordinator. Terribly long name for my role. I have watched people in developing countries live on less than a dollar a day, studied how World Vision works to develop communities so they can stand on their own two feet, understood that sometimes charities have to spend money to make money and most of all have found a work place where I personally seek to do everything I can each day to do my bit. Each day, over 30,000 children die of preventable causes, 30,000. How lucky are we that our dice was thrown and we won the roulette. Are we really doing enough to help? Can we ever do enough to help?

As I look above my desk to see my office, everyone is smiling in content that they love their jobs. Everyone here has a passion for change and feel part of the World Vision Family. There’s over 130 of us here, yet we feel that we are really in this together. I will miss working here, but have an aspiration of working for a charity again. The rain cloud is now making its way towards us, slight grey specks in our blue shelter. Our New Zealand journey has come to an end but it will always be in our hearts.

Travelling is not just seeing the new; it is also leaving behind. Not just opening doors; also closing them behind you, never to return. But the place you have left forever is always there for you to see whenever you shut your eyes.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

jen,
beautifully written, like something out of a novel - i could imagine you clear as day in your "linger" moment, inspiring you are not alone i think every one asks themselves those questions also - even the people who never went anywhere- asking themselve is this all life has to offer me? as long as you are happy - keep doing what you are doing.love you
ps when you eventually settle write a book!
sarxxx

TravelAsTheyGrow said...

Wow baby, you write so well. I loved this blog entry. Very proud to say you're my lady

Anonymous said...

Inspirational speech Jen, read every word and thought about every word.

Sounds like New Zealand has really become a part of you, maybe home rather than a place you stayed whilst travelling the world.

It's very important not to miss the beautiful colours of the rainbow while your looking for the pot of gold at the end of it, and it sounds to me like your savouring each colour as if you had never seen it before.

peace out x

Alison said...

Jen, this is such a lovely way to express something special about your time with us. As you travel and return home I hope you will linger a little longer in all the places and spaces you end up! And wherever you are, I know you will find God's presence already there beside you...
Take care and enjoy all the exciting changes ahead!
Keep in touch, A

Mum said...

Everyone who reads this will find inspiration in their life as you have......it truly is wonderfully written!!
I have printed up your blog and posted it to Nan to read. We are all so proud of what you both have achieved! I can't wait to throw my arms around you at the airport in December. Take good care of yourselves in the next couple of month's...love and miss you so much! xxxx